No Spanks To You
by Jenna Shirley Scoresby
It was my daughter’s 9th birthday yesterday so I called her 4th grade teacher to see what was acceptable to do for birthdays. I was told I couldn’t bring in any homemade goodies or candy of any kind, but I could bring in store-bought cookies or doughnuts to the classroom a half-hour before school ended for the day.
This was a far cry from my birthday celebrations at Archer Elementary School. We used to go down to the gym and get in a long line, teachers too. Birthday kids got down on hands and knees and crawled as fast as possible under our straddled legs while we “spanked” them as they crawled passed. The trick of it was as a spankee, the faster you crawl, the less spanking you get. And as a spanker, the faster you can spank, the more whacks you get at the birthday kid passing through. It was the “spanking machine” and we loved it.
Although not explicitly stated in my daughter’s school’s “no-touch policy,” I’d guess spanking machines aren’t allowed. Why did my generation grow up and suck all the fun out of school?
We have the same school treat policy here. I wonder if it’s a safety reason for no home-made food or they’re just tired of poorly cooked food.
I don’t remember the spanking or the food. Maybe, just maybe, they gave us a pencil on our birthday.
You missed out, Dallan, a pencil? when you could have gone through the spanking machine!
Yes, I’m sure some of these rules are for safety, but being SO CAREFUL wipes out a lot of the carefee-ness of being a kid.
I heard a kindergarten teacher yelling, “NO RUNNING!” during recess a while ago. Seriously? no running at recess?
I guess the point of my post is that my generation of thirtysomethings had so much freedom to run and play as kids, and we grew up to become parents of kids that can’t even give another kid a hug at school without being sent to the principal’s office.
Spanking machine. Reason #35 of why I could never live in Rexburg.
Yep. Definitely fun suckers out there. We never had to wear helmets riding bikes, playgrounds were “dangerous” (so a kid broke an arm now and then), it was alot more fun for us growing up.
I remember my first grade teacher at Adams Elementary pulling all the loose teeth. Because first graders have teeth coming and going, I think she pulled 5 or 6 teeth that day. That one would now fall under the “no touch policy” of today. However, we as kids thought it was great. We spent the remainder of the day with little waded up pieces of toilet paper on our desks because we were trying so hard to wiggle a tooth loose enough to have the teacher pull it.